Grim Views

After a long day fighting to purify the Vale, Ruuki sank down to sit at the small desk in her room at the inn. She stayed here so frequently that the keepers knew her name, and as she shed her armor she mulled over the task given to her by the High Inquisitor. She pulled out the now well-worn leather journal, its pages filled with writings and scraps from her travels, and she flipped through it, wondering how to write what she wanted to say.

"How can I sacrifice when I have nothing left to give? I've given the Grim all I can and then some as it is," she murmured to herself in contemplation. "Then again..." She tilted her head slightly as a thought occurred to her, and she grabbed her pencil to begin writing.

I have been with the Grim for some time now, particularly since the attack in which I lost my memories. Through patience, hard work and diligence, I have found my place here, and I have come to call my fellow guildmates my friends. We have fought hard together, shared stories around the fires at night, and terrorized the Alliance, and these are the times I would not trade for all of Azeroth.

However, through my journeys I have also regained my past, and learned who I was before I became Ruuki. I was Philomena Strongsoul, daughter of Markus Strongsoul, a proud warrior of the Strongbash clan. He had become a mentor to the younger warriors of the clan in his older years, and with a lifetime of fighting behind him, he wanted to teach us patience when wielding a sword, axe or hammer. He could still handle his own sword with ease despite the aches of old wounds, and even with practice weapons made of wood his strikes could leave rather colorful bruises. We learned well how to fight, though his lessons on observation and strategy were not so easily understood. It was hard to see things through his knowing eyes when our world was filled with danger. Still we took his lessons to heart and tried our best to emulate his ideals. He was proud of our progress, and had such hopes for us to help in guiding the Tauren tribes.

Then, we found him murdered in his home. I don't think he saw it coming, as he was still lying on his bed, his throat slit from ear to ear. My only guess is he earned enemies during his younger years, and they finally caught up to him, besting him as only a coward could.

She had to pause in her writing, controlling the anger that still waged within her at having to revisit that memory. She pressed pencil to paper firmly, the bold strokes of the charcoal betraying her emotions as she continued.

There are no words to describe the loss of a mentor and teacher, nor to describe the grief of losing one's father. I felt lost, and though I sought the guidance and path of the Sunwalker's ways, it did nothing to ease the pain I felt. I wanted justice. I wanted revenge. I wanted to hurt whoever had perpetrated such an act. It is with that mindset that I originally joined the Grim, whose Mandate resonated within the depths of my soul. Peace through Annihilation- I would finally find my peace, and my father's spirit could find his, once I annihilated the bastard that had slain him so spinelessly.

I had traveled across the sea in the hopes of seeking advice from the sage Trolls in the Stranglethorn Jungle. They are capable of seeing into things regarding the spirit, and I had hoped they could shed some light on who to look for and how to find them. Thus, Ruuki came to be.

I believe, now that I can look back on everything clearly, that losing my past for a time gave me the focus I needed to become stronger. With the Grim's guidance, I have become a powerful weapon in the fight against the tyranny of Hellscream as well as the continued onslaught of the Alliance. They have honed me, crafted me as a proud weaponsmith would a blade, and they have given me purpose. Their patience with me has been endless, and in return I have dedicated myself to answering their calls. When Alliance have been spotted and the Grim needs blades, I have answered. When delving into the Thunder King's lair, and now purifying the Vale of Hellscream's taint, I have walked alongside them, both as a fearsome blade to strike down our foes, as well as Vanguard to help hold the lines. I take pride in my place here, for it is here I have found a reason and a way to focus my strengths, and to work to further our cause.

With the return of my memories, I have been faced with reconciling my past with my present. My father's killer has not been found, at least not to my knowledge, yet my skills are still needed in the fight alongside the Grim. I cannot do both, since my father's ideals do not agree with the Mandate. He would have scolded me on using my anger and hatred of my enemies to fuel my decision to fight. I visited with my father's grave, in the hopes of finding my answer or perhaps to make peace, and it was made clear to me then- I cannot be both Philomena and Ruuki.

I will no longer spend my energy and time trying to honor ideals that truthfully are impossible to uphold. I have to continue towards the future and leave the past behind me. In time, I hope my father's spirit will understand. There is no task that will sway me from the Mandate, and I am prepared to dedicate my life to seeing it fulfilled, until my hands can no longer lift a shield and my last breath has left my body.

I am Ruuki. I am Grim.

Satisfied with her writings, she gently tore the pages from the journal and headed down into the guild hall, tacking it up on the notice board alongside the trials and notes from other guild members and supplicants. Perhaps her own experiences could help another guild member in their own trials and tribulations.

(( Bravo! ))

Syreena read Ruuki's writing with interest. She skimmed over the part about Ruuki sacrificing the values and ideals her mentor had taught her, but the part about sacrificing her quest for revenge hit home with the little rogue.

To some, the abandonment of hunting someone down to make them pay for their past crimes might not seem like much of a sacrifice, but Syreena knew better.

She too had spent time hunting someone from her past, someone who deserved a long, agonizing death. She was very close once, back in Shattrath, but before she could finish her work there, Grim duty called her back. The thought of him out there somewhere still nagged at her. Not a day went by when the rogue didn't feel the desire to resume the hunt, to bring an end to that long dark chapter of her life.

Someday, she told herself, she would.

And, she suspected, someday Ruuki might too. But for now, Ruuki was Grim, and there was no question in Syreena's mind that Ruuki would uphold her duties here.