2 + 2 = Happy Kittens by Emmons
Posted: Tue Nov 10, 2015 12:28 am
"You've been quite the bothersome thief now, Mister Indiana."
Emmons heard the voice before he saw where it was coming from. The roomhe had woken in was nearly pitch black, save for a single illuminatingorb about 1 meter above his head. The details on the Blood Elf girl'sface slowly came into focus in the soft light, and Emmons becamepainfully aware of the splitting pain in his skull.
"We're going to fix that now. You're not going to bother any more kittens now, will you?"
"Over my undead body", Emmons spit at the elf and tried vainly to getout of the chair he was shackled in to. "What the hell do you have metied up for anyways? Last time I checked killing strays wasn't exactlygrounds for imprisonment!"
"Oh Emmons, I think you'll find that where you are, we don't needgrounds for anything. Now tell me, did you enjoy spitting at me?"
"Sure as hell did, I'll do it again too." Emmons began to choke up agood spitwad when a shaft of excruciating pain bolted down his spine.Screaming in agony, Emmons tensed up and shook writhed in his shackles."What the hell was that!"
"That, Mister Indiana, was the beginning of your treatment."
"Treatment, what the hell? I demand you release me this moment. If youdon't let me go, you're going to have a full fist of Grim banging downyour door in about-GAAAAAAAH!" The invisible pain returned, this timetoo much for Emmons to handle. His body went limp as his vision fadedto black.
When he finally regained consciousness, Emmons realized hissurroundings had not changed at all. He was still in the room, it wasstill dark, and he was still hungry.
"Do you require food Mister Indiana?"
"I don't want your damn charity, let me out." Once more he felt thepain, this time his skin felt as if it had spontaneously combusted, anda kind soul had pured salt onto his exposed tissue. "What the fuck? Whyare you torturing me!?"
"We're not torturing you Mister Indiana, we're helping you. Now, eat up."
"Like hell I will! Why don't you take your pointy ears and shove themstraight up your dam-AAAAGH!!" This exchange went on for quit some timebefore Emmons, physically defeated and mentally drained succumbed tohis baser instincts. "Fine...I'll...I'll eat your damn food."
The elf smiled softly, and offered up a plate of gnome.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
In isolation and between blackouts, Emmons lost complete track of time.He didn't know if it had been hours or days since he'd been out. Hishosts had been kind enough to free him from his bonds, but Emmons foundhimself unable to move more than a few feet without meeting aninvisible barrier. He had undergone several "sessions" with his captor,each time by the girl. He had also seen another elf, a male, possiblythe girl's superior. He never spoke, but often watched the femaleadministering Emmons' "treatment". His Hearthstone was gone, along withhis weapons and armor. They were his only contact in this dungeon. Hedidn't even know if the Grim had even noticed him missing.
A tiny crack of light grew into a man-sized portal, temporarilyblinding Emmons as the male elf stepped through, oddly unaccompanied bythe girl. "Hello Emmons. I bet you're wondering why you're here. I betyou're wondering who I am. Well I can answer one of those for youEmmons, my name is Albumij Innan." Emmons could barely move, but hestared met the elf's eyes to signify that he was paying attention."You've lasted a lot longer than your predecessors, Emmons. Mostsubjects don't even last through the first session. I bet you thinkyou're tough stuff, Emmons. No, I know you do because I know everythingabout you. I know you were raised in Lordaeron. I know you have abrother named Burine. I even know how much you used to hate yourselffor being incapable of love for that troll girl. You see Emmons.Nothing gets by us, and thats why you're here. Those kittens are therefor a reason, and your senseless violence has got to stop, and we cando this one of two ways. I believe you've been enjoying the first way for quit some time."
"Blow it out your a-" was about as far as Emmons got before theall-too-familiar torment returned and pushed Emmons to the dark place.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Thalevia walked through the Silvermoon Bazaar, Maadom happily at herside, feeding off the ambient energies. She spotted her friend Emmonsacross the street and waved him over.
"Hello Thalevia, are you having a wonderful stay in Silvermoon?"
Thalevia cackled "Ha, Emmons, you're unusually upbeat. What's the occasion?"
"Don't you know, Citizen? Happiness is mandatory in Silvermoon. By decree of the Regent Lord."
Thalevia was puzzled. "Um, Emmons. You're...Emmons. Since when do you care anything for the laws of the Elves?"
"Silvermoon law is Priority One, Thalevia. Excuse me, I've spotted adiscarded vial I must reclaim the waste." Thalevia watched Emmonsscurry towards the rubbish on the ground, collect it, carry it to anearby security construct which summarily zapped the glass bottle intoa fine ash. Confused, she bent down to Maadom's level. "You think he'sbeen drinking again?"
Emmons heard the voice before he saw where it was coming from. The roomhe had woken in was nearly pitch black, save for a single illuminatingorb about 1 meter above his head. The details on the Blood Elf girl'sface slowly came into focus in the soft light, and Emmons becamepainfully aware of the splitting pain in his skull.
"We're going to fix that now. You're not going to bother any more kittens now, will you?"
"Over my undead body", Emmons spit at the elf and tried vainly to getout of the chair he was shackled in to. "What the hell do you have metied up for anyways? Last time I checked killing strays wasn't exactlygrounds for imprisonment!"
"Oh Emmons, I think you'll find that where you are, we don't needgrounds for anything. Now tell me, did you enjoy spitting at me?"
"Sure as hell did, I'll do it again too." Emmons began to choke up agood spitwad when a shaft of excruciating pain bolted down his spine.Screaming in agony, Emmons tensed up and shook writhed in his shackles."What the hell was that!"
"That, Mister Indiana, was the beginning of your treatment."
"Treatment, what the hell? I demand you release me this moment. If youdon't let me go, you're going to have a full fist of Grim banging downyour door in about-GAAAAAAAH!" The invisible pain returned, this timetoo much for Emmons to handle. His body went limp as his vision fadedto black.
When he finally regained consciousness, Emmons realized hissurroundings had not changed at all. He was still in the room, it wasstill dark, and he was still hungry.
"Do you require food Mister Indiana?"
"I don't want your damn charity, let me out." Once more he felt thepain, this time his skin felt as if it had spontaneously combusted, anda kind soul had pured salt onto his exposed tissue. "What the fuck? Whyare you torturing me!?"
"We're not torturing you Mister Indiana, we're helping you. Now, eat up."
"Like hell I will! Why don't you take your pointy ears and shove themstraight up your dam-AAAAGH!!" This exchange went on for quit some timebefore Emmons, physically defeated and mentally drained succumbed tohis baser instincts. "Fine...I'll...I'll eat your damn food."
The elf smiled softly, and offered up a plate of gnome.
-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------
In isolation and between blackouts, Emmons lost complete track of time.He didn't know if it had been hours or days since he'd been out. Hishosts had been kind enough to free him from his bonds, but Emmons foundhimself unable to move more than a few feet without meeting aninvisible barrier. He had undergone several "sessions" with his captor,each time by the girl. He had also seen another elf, a male, possiblythe girl's superior. He never spoke, but often watched the femaleadministering Emmons' "treatment". His Hearthstone was gone, along withhis weapons and armor. They were his only contact in this dungeon. Hedidn't even know if the Grim had even noticed him missing.
A tiny crack of light grew into a man-sized portal, temporarilyblinding Emmons as the male elf stepped through, oddly unaccompanied bythe girl. "Hello Emmons. I bet you're wondering why you're here. I betyou're wondering who I am. Well I can answer one of those for youEmmons, my name is Albumij Innan." Emmons could barely move, but hestared met the elf's eyes to signify that he was paying attention."You've lasted a lot longer than your predecessors, Emmons. Mostsubjects don't even last through the first session. I bet you thinkyou're tough stuff, Emmons. No, I know you do because I know everythingabout you. I know you were raised in Lordaeron. I know you have abrother named Burine. I even know how much you used to hate yourselffor being incapable of love for that troll girl. You see Emmons.Nothing gets by us, and thats why you're here. Those kittens are therefor a reason, and your senseless violence has got to stop, and we cando this one of two ways. I believe you've been enjoying the first way for quit some time."
"Blow it out your a-" was about as far as Emmons got before theall-too-familiar torment returned and pushed Emmons to the dark place.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Thalevia walked through the Silvermoon Bazaar, Maadom happily at herside, feeding off the ambient energies. She spotted her friend Emmonsacross the street and waved him over.
"Hello Thalevia, are you having a wonderful stay in Silvermoon?"
Thalevia cackled "Ha, Emmons, you're unusually upbeat. What's the occasion?"
"Don't you know, Citizen? Happiness is mandatory in Silvermoon. By decree of the Regent Lord."
Thalevia was puzzled. "Um, Emmons. You're...Emmons. Since when do you care anything for the laws of the Elves?"
"Silvermoon law is Priority One, Thalevia. Excuse me, I've spotted adiscarded vial I must reclaim the waste." Thalevia watched Emmonsscurry towards the rubbish on the ground, collect it, carry it to anearby security construct which summarily zapped the glass bottle intoa fine ash. Confused, she bent down to Maadom's level. "You think he'sbeen drinking again?"