A New Companion (Journal) by Setrema

[Keeper Of Lore]

Hello my new friend. The Inquisitor reccomended I start keeping a journal. Seeing as I donated my last one to the Records, I decided we would make you. I will do with you what I didn't do with my last friend. You shall have eyes even, able to see the things that happen as they do. You'll be an even better storyteller to me than my last friend. Whatever to name you, as talking to something without a name gets well, strange. Hm, more of a title than a name, but you will be addressed as Archive.

Now then Archive, where will we begin. We have joined the Grim but a short time ago, but already feel comfortable with many around us. Notable people would be Cessily, Beutha, Kiaransalius and of course Dreadweaver Qabian.

I will break these down a little for you so you will know them as I know them. I will also continue to explain people as I find them to become significant to me.

Beutha is an orc of the rogue persuasion. I haven't spoken to her much as of late as I am sure she is on some secretive assignment from an employer. She has a strong personality, which I admire. She is friendly and enjoyable to be around so far.

Kiaransalius is a Blood Knight. The Mistress insists that they be called paladins until they prove themselves, and I feel as long is she is able to prove herself to those training her, she deserves any title they bestow upon her. I really only know her so far as she is a close companion of Cessily's. She is a pleasent and fun individual, full of energy. She shows affection more freely than I, and I envy her for it for some reason.

Cessily. When I first heard the rumors of this girl, I thought it would be best to avoid her, and all behavior she displayed. When I first spoke to her however, she convinced me otherwise instantly. She was accepting, inviting, and talkative. Opinionated when I first met her, but she has mellowed some with time. Already I feel as if she is a soul mate, should such a thing exist. She is my counselor, my friend, there to listen when I have need of such. Truely a priceless individual I am proud to be considered a friend of, regardless of what the general populous would say of it.

And my Dreadweaver. He's a living puzzle, which thus far happens to be in its conatiner for the most part so I cannot even begin to figure it out.. The fact that I have to figure him out is alluring. He's so guarded though, and that I suppose is understandable. I don't know anything much of his past so I cannot say if the attitude is justified or not. There are times when I want to tell him how attractive I think he is, not just his looks, but his aloof, mildly concieted attitude as well. I think that would be a mistake though. He doesn't seem to be looking for any such thing, which I wouldn't think I would be either... And I am now babbling to you without a purpose.

What were we discussing again?

Oh yes. We were moving onto Winter's Veil. I spent some of it trying to complete tasks for various employeers, some of it speaking over the stone while around a small fire I had built, and some with my brother Iacton, listening to him rant about how wonderful this woman was and blah, blah, blah. I really should try to be more tolerant of his aquaintances, but they haven't been good enough for him. I exchanged gifts with Cessily and Qabian. I gave them both outfits of their favorite color, which was red for the both of them. They both seemed to appreciate them, which made me glad. I made Qabian's myself, and fitted Cessily's.

In return, Cessily gave me her mothers robe. It was a garb from Dalaran, worn by their, which Cessily's mother was of. She mentioned that Her mother was truely among the most powerful of the Quel'Dorei, and that she loved her very much. It touched me that someone could trust another so much so quickly.

Qabian actually gave me a gift, which was a suprise in itself. He sent me practical items that I know I will use as well as a marvelously cut topaz. It is a gorgeous gem and I am really rather impressed by his actions. Maybe he isn't as cold as he makes himself out to be.

I am sure you are bored of hearing m speak for now, so I will let us both rest, Archive.

[Keeper Of Lore]

Archive I will keep this conversation brief. Today did not lack in excitement, or confusion....

Where to begin...

I was looking after Jestal, a friend of my brother. Though he has talents with fire, he is prideful and foolish. So being kind and what not, I decided to follow him to help him with a task he had been commisioned to do. I caught up with him and he started mocking me as usual, unable to look me in the face as usual. How positively rude! This of course leads to an arguement, which almost even greeting him tends to.

Near the end of my patience, I call upon Miss Kiaransalius to be a hopeful voice of wisdom. It seemed to have little effect, which was of no suprise to me. I left the scene, not caring to argue with him any more for that eve. However, when Kiaransalius did not follow after me shortly... Curiousity took hold as well as took control. I thought it best to sneak back, which I must admit, I think even the most trained rogue would have been proud of me for being as stealthy as I was.

I eavesdropped upon a lenghty conversation which delivered to me an unexpected blow. The brat announced his actual fondness of me to Kiaransalius! Being completely suprised and off guard, I....lost my footing as well as my hiding spot. I had been exposed by my own lack of training in mountaineering...Something I will have to work on, surely.

Needless to say, Archive, I am left with a choice.

Do I pursue Jestal or Dreadweaver Qabian?

I am fatigued though. So we shall make such a decision at a later time. Rest well Archive.

[Keeper Of Lore]

Oh Archive, there is so much on my mind... I question if I am really a good example for Grim to follow. I question this because no matter my efforts or my own attitude that I display for them, they still quarrel openly and firequently... I wouldn't have thought being polite to be such a hard thing to do. Mayhaps I misjudged things.

On another note, the Masquerade seems to be less than popular at the moment, which that in itself saddens me. It seems that it is to be a test for my new status as Harbinger of Lore. I don't think myself to be a lousy hostess, nor the reason for the Masquerade be lousy either. If you really care to learn of such, you will just have to wait til I give you eyes.

I worry about Jestal. I haven't heard from him for a few days now. I wonder if he has done something rash and has gotten himself hurt. Wouldn't suprise me If he is hiding out from me for fear that he dissapointed me. It's not as if I require for him to be invincible. I want him to have some weaknesses and flaws. I can relate to that far more easily that some...lieing being claiming to be perfect.

Speaking of personal relations, Qabian and I sorted some issues out. It would seem that my intentions for him were misguided by myself. I wanted to know him, as he is like this exquizite living puzzle. Somehow I interpretted this as I wanted him to be mine. In some twisted sense, I suppose one could associate with really knowing a mysterious individual as ...nevermind. One really couldn't. I hope we both come to consider each other as friends. I know I see him as a friend.

Archive, there is so much more I want to tell you, but I am so tired after all that has took place today.... Soon, when I begin to tell you stories of my days during the days, we can have more lengthy conversations.

Thank you for always being such a good listener.

[Keeper Of Lore]

Archive, last eve all the Grim discovered that the Mistress stepped down from leading us, giving way to the Artificer. I do hope he does well, despite the Mandate truely being our guide. I really do not see much changing if anything at all does, but one can never be sure of the future can they?

I still have much to attend to Archive, so perhaps we shall dicuss more shortly.

[Keeper Of Lore]

I do not know why it seems so hard to be just another insect in the colony at times. I know I am not the only one with different opinions in the Grim, yet I wonder why at times, we are expected to keep everything to ourself. We all are Grim, and I would hope we all do as the Mandate expects us to.

I am sure Qabian is only so harsh so another isn't even more so. -speaking through sobs- I should be thankful for that, but, even as forgiving as the reprimand was, it just seem so cruel. I... I don't know if it was just because it came from him or not.... What's done is done, and it cannot be changed. I have only but to deal with it.

[Keeper Of Lore]

Archive, my life has been a maelstrom, the past few moons . Everything has seemed unable for even myself to manipulate or control. I know now exactly what I must do.

He has doubted me with acceptable cause, as I have dissapointed him more than once. Yet, he tolerates it and helps me as much as he can. He keeps me at the hems of his robes, feeding me little tidbits here and there, keeping my attention solely on him. He has scolded me, made me doubt myself, left in an utter stupor f confusion. Still, I go back to him, ever eager to learn more, maybe even have him wrapped around my finger as I am around his....

He has accused me of thawing Archive, which I probably have somewhat. He wishes I had remained cold as I was when he met me. I asked of him and he gave to me as I requested.

It is time I return the favor. He is the man I long for. I shall show him the woman he cannot resist...

[Keeper Of Lore]

Worth.... I doubt my own now .

So far every attempt I have made at him is utterly nullified. What do I do? I need guidance, advice, consoling... Yet the main provider is now the sole cause. Why am I so careless? Surely if I was a little more shrewd, calculating, malicious...

Why am I so beneath him?

[Keeper Of Lore]

The masquerade was a success, it wasn't the foremost thing on my mind at the time though, at least not at the beginning of it.

Lascivious was concerned about me. That makes me wonder why. Not enough to pursue such knowledge though.

I haven't much words as of late. I guess they really are not needed, which is really rather odd Archive. I depend on them so much, for everything I do. Yet, I lack them, silence. When I do speak it confuses me sometimes. He seems to be concerned about it.

He has no care for me, only if I am able to kill. I want more from him though.

[Keeper Of Lore]

A kiss was stolen from me. It was not stolen by him. It was exciting, infuriating and hollow. I love him., but will that bring me happiness? I am content but highly disatisfied with my current situation, chasing that which will always be steps ahead. It is amusing for now, but will I tire of it? What will that entail?

I want him, all to myself. I want to be in his arms, having his face next to my own. It...will never be though, and it dissapoints me.

[Keeper Of Lore]

I grow tied of the chase. It is hollow now and lacks the entertainment it once had. I want more than what He can provide for me, something substantial and reciprocating. I am sure a man will present himself soon. At least I hope one will.

For now, it is late and I grow cold in the winter night. I will sate the desire for warmth with a fire and a fluffy blanket. I want more.

[Keeper Of Lore]

For the moment, I have lost my drive for many things. Maybe I have pushed myself too hard for too many goals. I think a small rest would be most beneficial and recooperative.

Perhaps a little revitalization would be good for me, renewing my energy to reach for things I have not yet recieved.

[Keeper Of Lore]

I am a waste Archive. I have so much to give, so much to learn, so much the destory and create, and...I am nothing.

I haven't activated my stone for any length for days, I have been in the same bland room for days, only leaving to bathe. I don't want to do anything right now. Nothing. I am glad he doesn't see me like this. Even though I shouldn't care, and don't want to anymore, I still do.

I want to rest. Goodnight Archive.

[Keeper Of Lore]

Emotions take their toll. I was a victim of them not long ago. It was pitiful. However, it gave me some clarity. He came to make sure I was...sane, I know it was not because he cared about -me-, but my well-being as a mage. I must distance my affection from him. Perhaps the knight will be able to do that. I doubt it, but, it is something I can hope for.

I am becoming sure of myself again Archive. This is more than acceptable. I will be Perfect. We obliterated Velen, Staghelm, Tyrande...There was no real contest in them. I was dissapointed, especially by Velen. The Draenei had been fabled to hold so much power, the chosen of the light. He proved the least challenging of the Alliances leaders.

The Kirin Tor Archmage... She had power. Her understanding of magic, her command of it. It was amazing. I want to be better than her. I will be better than her. One day there will be tales of my excellence in magic spread across Azeroth and Draenor alike. Jaina Proudmoore will be nothing but a memory in time.

[Keeper Of Lore]

Archive, I am growing sparatic, detached, comfortable. Do I do it to guard myself, distract myself, further myself...from him? It's a very strong possibility. In time I am sure that goal will be met marvelously. When he is but a teacher, and I am but a student in my own eyes. I don't think it to be a simple, instantaneous result. If I start to act in such a way now, surely it will become all but natural. I desire and dread that moment.

...He can no longer be what I strive for.

The boy still touches me, embraces me. He tries to drown his affection for me out as I do for my teacher. We are both ridiculous. Trying so hard to overcome our hearts, yet I wonder if either of will ever succeed. Wonderous that we are so similar in that one aspect. He distracts himself with another girl. Best of luck to them both, though I think it will only further the spiral.

I draw another in. A knight. I want to be distracted by him. Not to think of my teacher anymore. I don't intend to use him, but, it's starting to come so naturally. He captures my attention as my teacher did once. I don't ask as many questions though. I will only take the knight for what I see him as. If he offers, I will partake, but I will not inquire. I won't repeat my mistakes.

I will be me once again, nothing more, nothing less.

[Keeper Of Lore]

We kill things, the knight and I. I am growing fond of him, though I am unsure how exactly. Are we just good partners, friends, comrades? There isn't an excess of words by any means when we apend time together Archive. I...kind of like that though. We talk when it is needed and little more. It keeps things simple, which I can use right now as other tasks and goals are upon me down at the moment.

Rosalynd seems to think that the knight and I are... I don't know exactly how she sees us. I know I am attracted to him. He is handsome, and his arrogance does win me over a little.... We're stopping this topic before we let it wander too far.

I haven't talked to him in a while now. It's probably for the best, but I wonder about him. What is he doing? How is he? I am still curious.

Speaking of wondering how people are, I was just wondering about Beutha. She's catching up to me which is cause for plenty of excitement. Soon, we can delve together again, and slay Alliance, and have the rematch. The rematch...I wonder what things she will have learned by then. I should practivce my own set of tricks. I learned a few more, it's just being able to use them effectively that will be a challenge.

Well, I think this is a fine stopping point for our conversation, don't you agree?